Excuse Me, while I ramble in my thoughts here ...

I have oftentimes wondered if the soul leaves the body before the actual physical body functions cease, and at what moment? and would you know it? if you were there would you recognize it?

While my ex was sick, he lived in a little house not far from me. His sisters were there and they did the best they could, never having experienced a death or dealings with Hospice, but that is another whole story in itself. They would call me for advice and want me to come over to soothe John by talking to him because they could not.

Those last few months were agonizing for everybody. Little Bella missed him terribly, they were the bestest buddies. We all watched him go from walking and talking to bedridden, and then to not talking but responding, and then ultimately not responding, only to stimuli. He would be talking to people who weren't even there or seeming too, looking around as if someone were in the room, and talking to them. I think that is hardest part of losing someone is them not being able to tell you what they need.

I am not really sure at which point I believed him to be dead, and my newly turned 4-year-old granddaughter confirmed my beliefs. She shocked everyone. You should know that her and her "papaw John" were inseparable. They spent countless hours together. He loved my daughter and little "Isabella Rose" even though they were not blood-related. I remember picking her one day from daycare a few days or even a week later after John had died, and the worker asked me when John had died.

When I told her she seemed surprised, and said are you sure? I said yes. She said that Isabella told her he died the day of a recent field trip. Curiously I asked her when that was. She relayed to me that she had noticed little Isabella away from the group of field trip kids, and sitting quietly alone, so she went over to talk to her, and asked her what was wrong. She said, "My papaw just died." The daycare worker said she did not think too much about it, consoled her, as she knew he had been gravely ill, and perhaps had died the night before.

She then said Isabella told her while sitting there that her papaw John told her, that he was there a few moments ago, hugged and kissed her, and told her he loved her, and to be a good girl. The worker had thought that he had died and she had been told about it, and was making up a story, however that was not the case. At the time of the field trip, John had been alive but near death. It wasn't until the wee hours of the next morning that his actual body did cease to sustain any life, and he passed from this world. I received a phone call that day.

Unbelievably eerie, I believe he did visit little Isabella that day.

no more time to ramble, its back to work for me.