what in tarnation?!

 

Who are you calling a cooty queen?

you lint licker!



I could have sworn I heard this statement on an Orbit Chewing Gum commercial a while ago, cracked me up! I'm still wondering what the heck this has to do with chewing gum?

I did! I did! and here it is...



What will be next?

Hi Ho Silver...

away!

..and they're headed down the homestretch folks, its gonna be a close one..."

wheeeee!


*the above were products of boredom, and are not my original creations other than the captions*


but rather came via email to me, and they sure gave me a laugh!

hope they did the same for you!

haha Monday's premature ejaculation on a Sunday night...

No Heath, You can Lick My Muff...



... but you WON'T be Dining in the Big Valley tonight...

   

if you'd like to try your hand at captioning a pic, here ya go...




stwange, very stwange...weeeeee!


Have a great Monday everybody!

Ol' Blue

A young cowboy from Wyoming goes off to college, but half way through the semester, he has foolishly squandered all his money.

He calls home. 'Dad,' he says, 'You won't believe what modern education is developing! They actually have a program here in Laramie that will teach our dog, Ol' Blue how to talk!'

'That's amazing,' his Dad says. 'How do I get Ol' Blue in that program?'

'Just send him down here with $1,000' the young cowboy says. 'I'll get him in the course.'

So, his father sends the dog and $1,000.

About two-thirds through the semester, the money again runs out. The boy calls home.

'So how's Ol' Blue doing son,' his father asks.

'Awesome, Dad, he's talking up a storm,' he says, 'but you just won't
believe this - they've had such good results they have started to teach the animals how to read!'

'Read!' says his father, 'No kidding?! How do we get Blue in that
program?'

Just send $2,500, I'll get him in the class.'

The money promptly arrives. But our hero has a problem. At the end of
the year, his father will find out the dog can neither talk, nor read. So he shoots the dog.

When he arrives home at the end of the year, his father is all excited. 'Where's Ol' Blue? I just can't wait to see him read something and talk!'

'Dad,' the boy says, 'I have some grim news. Yesterday morning, just
before we left to drive home, Ol' Blue was in the living room, kicked back in the recliner, reading the Wall Street Journal, like he usually does.

Then he turned to me and asked, 'So, is your daddy still messing' around with that little redhead who lives in town?'

The father exclaimed, 'I hope you shot that son of a biscuit eater before he talks to your Mother!'

'I sure did, Dad!'

'That's my boy!'     

poor Ol'Blue.

Duh, big red truck!

The patient hurt his knee when he tripped on the side rock.

Yeah, the sidewalk, you know!

hahaha

ouch!eeee!

haha!

Do I really need to say anything?

rollin' rollin' rollin' on the floor LMAO!

welcome to management...

where one touch of my IM sends a request halfway across the world, a response back, and a thank you from me, with a message back that says, "No need to thank me, I am here to serve you."

Really? I was taken aback a little.  Been a while since I heard that one! too bad the guys in the US aren't that eager to please! ha! However my next immediate thought was that I could get used to that! LOL ... Does that mean I can order up a back massage and a catered lunch? Oh, that might be asking a little too much and a little hard to get done from India! yikes!

I do love it that these people are so eager to serve! that's because they are taking over the medical transcription business.

This past week was a nightmare on the management homefront for a newbie like me, if it wasn't email issues, it was scheduling difficulties, taking responsibility for allocating work to 8 different people, learning the procedures, navigating the software...yada yada...I can tell you I was not prepared to step into the shoes of someone who does the job of 3 people, and who is lucky she is trapsing halfway around the world in India, cause if she were close by, I would have choked her! ..and several times! LOL

I let her have my rant one night in an email, raving about my lunacy of a day and how inept I felt I was not trained to do this job in her absence, la-te-da, and the fact that I was not expecting the responsibility I got slapped with, and that my paycheck had better match my stress level or else! LOL I told her that if I got custody of my granddaughter here in a week or so, that I did not have time for two 24/7 jobs! and allocating on the weekends too!

What a pain in the rawwrrr! There were two days there I just about told them to take that job and shove it!  I was ready to bail, had my stuff walking out the door! stressed out to the max.  I was ready to drink and smoke too byGod! Especially on Friday, somebody's internet was down, they were only going to work till noon; another one's computer crashed on them, we got bombarded with work over what we normally get, it was crazy! my email was acting up AGAIN!!!! and it was a juggling act all day just to get the work allocated to the right people to keep the customer reps happy and the clients happy! Sheesh! Even though I did the best I could at allocating, there was not enough people to cover that mad workload, so I worked from 7 to 7 myself, but vowed that would be the last day I'd do that.

Today, Monday, was a piece of cake compared to Friday!  I am just now feeling a little comfortable with all I need to do.  Being in the production business doing medical transcription reports, we have TAT (turn around time) mostly of 24 hours.  That means from the time its called in till the time its out is 24 hours, only a few clients give us 48 hours.  My DDS TAT times were exceeding 100 hours.  Critey! that's what happens when you do not have enough QA people to do a particular client and the workload for that one particular client is just massive!  The US in charge of production (my boss for nearly 12 years) and who is now a part of this large corporation looked at me today and said, "I do not want you having to proof at all, your job is now management, and we have the people, and the resources ... use them."  He was very nice to me as he knows I am trying to keep everything lined out, and will even dive in myself and proof if need be.  I told him I would have no trouble doing that! just show me the money and give me the extra hands! I had forgotten that being around all the old office people is kinda fun, actually!

and how was your week? weekend?  Sheesh where I have been? Working like a slave I tellyuns!

Through all the madness here lately...

with work and personal family issues, I had forgotten what a great stress reliever it is just to sit and play the piano.  I have always loved classical music, and when I play more often than not its classical.  I miss my quiet time it seems here lately.  Its already after 11 p.m., and wow this day has done by quick with having to set the clocks forward an hour?  I realize I am way out of practice at playing the piano and it definitely needs a tuneup, but that's okay, my neighbors don't seem to mind...LOL...and the kids love to sing along to some old favorite tunes like Oh Suzannah, My Darling Clementine, and Shoo Fly Don't Bother Me...cause I belong to some-bod-y!

Hope everybody had a great weekend.  I'll try to get around to visit in a few days...

Its been a wild time in the old town here in Appalchia. over and out.

Whose Birthday Is It?

Yep, its my birthday!

How old am I?

It seems kids always ask. I told my granddaughter, 

"I'm $49.95 plus shipping & handling!"

and this cartoon cracked me up! hahaha!

Hope everybody is having a good Monday.

Calgon...Take Me Away!

I don't think I knew what I was getting into when I decided to become the team leader for my QA supervisor. While she is trapsing on foreign soil, I am here trying to figure out what the hell happened. Why wasn't I told this...that...or the other?!

They failed to mention to me (until the day before she left) that I would be coming into the office everyday? Are you kidding me? Moi? Who has worked at home now for how many years? You want me to come into the office EVERY day for 7 weeks? What are you people? Hard up for company or what? If I can help it, I won't be there but for very few hours, if any.

I did go in Friday, and believe me...I could have done better at home here. I missed having my own computer, knowing where my stuff was on it, and worst of all not having my email (which I did not have access to there and which is major hindrance I might add)...if it wasn't one thing, it was another! not to mention I had to dress out of my jammies?! the atrocity I tell ya! and then as soon as I was trying to get some proofing done on an account, the foot pedal wouldn't work and what about that cheap assed headset I had to use...ugh...it was the kind that felt like a stethoscope right in your ear with this foam piece, and my ears felt like they were on fire! ha! well I never!!!

and who can listen to reports when the desk I was at housed the front office and the phones, and there were constant distractions which are just not a routine part of my day! I told them I would need to have my own office if I was mandated to be there, out of the mainstream noise factor!

I did learn that we were getting more QA people to help proof reports and lessen the workload but that's more people to try to keep track of, like I don't have enough to do already! I have a hard time keeping track of the 7 people I have at the moment, who are contracted, and some work in different time zones. Upon further questioning as to who was going to train these new people, I was told I would be? Who said? Of course that was the first I had heard about it. Go figure. Did I mention I haven't heard a word of becoming salaried instead of hourly, but at this rate, even having to dole out work on the weekend, it would pay them to put me salary, because I ain't doing this for free! and I sure as heck ain't going to proof work myself. I'm going to blow before this 7 week charade is up!

Yep, I'd say they ain't paying me enough for the stress to come!

HolyMotherofGawd!