Where is the FUN(kin) Halloween party ?
How about a little Funk & Soul that moves?
Creepy Dolls....
Do dollies creep you out?
In a town in the woods at the top of a hill
There's a house where no one lives
So you take a big bag of your big city money there and buy it
Then at night when you're all alone
And the house is dark there's a noise upstairs
At the top of the stairs there's a door so you take a deep breath and try it
And the flashlight shines on something moving just inside the door
There's a tattered dress and a feeling that you've felt somewhere before
And there's the creepy doll
That always follows you
It's got a ruined eye
That's always open....
This was dug up on the land at Hale Farm and Village, yikes!
Sleep Tight, My Sweet Pretties, Don’t Let the Dollies Bite Ya~!
Theme Thursday...
At the end of a forgotten lane, it sits. No one alive remembers when it was last lived in. A cold wind howls over the hillside, a mournful chorus drawn from the eaves. Dead leaves rustle across the dried, patchy grasses. It is a stark and blasted land, the vegetation sparse and sere. Nothing alive can be heard. Not a bird, not even a distant dog howling...nothing but the incessant scraping of branch against branch, as of the bones of restless legions of dead things...
Yes, there are many strange and foreboding places where the warming glow of a noon-day sun never touches. And being such places of eternal darkness, there, just beneath the surface of our perception, lies an atmosphere wherein lurk malign entities culled from the darkest corners of man’s souls throughout history, straining to be set loose upon the face of a dismal planet and prey on unsuspecting passers-by. There they bide their time in seething hatred of life, and living, and ALL that it stands for: that which they can no longer have—nor ever take, ‘cept in the cold, hard hours of the night when men's fancies may give them cause to doubt the solidity of that which they otherwise call “reality”. Once sunken to the depths of this uncertain morass of darkness, men entertain other thoughts; certain ideas of deep and dreadful intent which each one assumes is his or her own secret shame as they huddle in unspoken horror that the rumors of a “hidden reality” may actually be true.
It is at times such as this that purchase is given for these two disparate realms to cross; the one warm and bright—the other, cold, dark and as murky as the depths of the deepest unknown ocean, and just as frightening. Together, the laws of nature become blurred, uncertain. Shadows of dark, heavy, seldom glimpsed shapes lumber putrescent and just out of range or around strange corners with unnatural angles that we privately pray are not there.
author and copyright belongs to Dennis. He certainly knows how to set a chilly mood for this time of year!
Fright To The Finish
I love a good cartoon! Especially when it involves figamentations and superstishkins!
and while I'm gathering up that scary dolly pictures! ooooo!
and while I'm gathering up that scary dolly pictures! ooooo!
Thursday already?!
Wanta little sugar with your tea, girls?
Ask for Tau over at Simon's place! You gotta read this.
scary...LOL
and today in my transcription world, I have knocked off 55 reports so far, and 25 more still remaining on my roster to do! ugh! but time for lunch...a nice egg sammich with cheese on toast! however, I am craving a chicken/ham cordon bleu sub from the local subshop! and you can bet you sweet bippee if I had a car (nope no car yet, another gripe for a another day) I'd be there today!!!!
oh yeah and before I forget...later on and tomorrow I will be posting some more scary babydoll pics! just in time for Halloween...and of course a Friday Night Fright!
Ask for Tau over at Simon's place! You gotta read this.
wow, this week has flown by!
almost Halloween...
and then November...more cold weather, turkey and pumpkin pie...and snow...
and then there's only 56 days until Christmas?
scary...LOL
and today in my transcription world, I have knocked off 55 reports so far, and 25 more still remaining on my roster to do! ugh! but time for lunch...a nice egg sammich with cheese on toast! however, I am craving a chicken/ham cordon bleu sub from the local subshop! and you can bet you sweet bippee if I had a car (nope no car yet, another gripe for a another day) I'd be there today!!!!
oh yeah and before I forget...later on and tomorrow I will be posting some more scary babydoll pics! just in time for Halloween...and of course a Friday Night Fright!
Marker Fun! Random Blogstream Post Page #94
I figured it might be fun just to randomly select a past post I did on my blog at Blogstream and post it! Today's post was from Friday February 8, 2008...
I don't know a kid alive that doesn't screech for joy at a new box of markers or crayons! My little granddaughter tells me that she NEEDS some markers! like she's in withdrawal or something. I know how much she dearly loves these things.
Occasionally I find where she decorated a few things in the house, although at almost 6 years old she's not so bad anymore.
I am going this evening to pick her up a Valentine's Day care package and send to her, and will probably include a box of markers!
of course, although I don't have any pictures of her at this moment to put up, she does use her body for a canvas, as most kids do! and she has decorated herself quite nicely with markers on occasion. This kid pictured is nothing compared to what I've seen Isabella do. She is quite the budding artist at times, however I do encourage her to use paper! and most times markers have to just wear off the skin!
All in the spirit of fun, and I just laugh about it myself! However, I might get a little upset as a parent if I came into the room and my infant child was covered from head to toe, and unrecognizable!
eeeeeeek! obviously a Sharpie original! and boy is Sis in BIG trouble!
Well, I'm not sure what happened in this particular situation; obviously the parent was busy for a little too long?! and hopefully they were washable markers? Which, by the way, are not always that washable I find.
Kids can do the darndest things!!
Have a great day bloggers!
Occasionally I find where she decorated a few things in the house, although at almost 6 years old she's not so bad anymore.
I am going this evening to pick her up a Valentine's Day care package and send to her, and will probably include a box of markers!
of course, although I don't have any pictures of her at this moment to put up, she does use her body for a canvas, as most kids do! and she has decorated herself quite nicely with markers on occasion. This kid pictured is nothing compared to what I've seen Isabella do. She is quite the budding artist at times, however I do encourage her to use paper! and most times markers have to just wear off the skin!All in the spirit of fun, and I just laugh about it myself! However, I might get a little upset as a parent if I came into the room and my infant child was covered from head to toe, and unrecognizable!
eeeeeeek! obviously a Sharpie original! and boy is Sis in BIG trouble!
Well, I'm not sure what happened in this particular situation; obviously the parent was busy for a little too long?! and hopefully they were washable markers? Which, by the way, are not always that washable I find.
Kids can do the darndest things!!
Have a great day bloggers!
how about a little "Milk Cow Blues"
Here's Eddie Cochran performing "Milk Cow Blues" 1960, shortly before his fatal car crash. This version of "Milk Cow Blues" was way ahead of it's time. Pictures taken from the Internet, and the audio track was cleaned before making the video. Long live the memory of Eddie Cochran. I hope you enjoy.
Makes me want some Oreos and cold milk!
Do you know who the original belongs to? No? Well, keep reading...
The song, Milk Cow Blues, was written by James (Kokomo) Arnold and released sometime from 1934 to 1938. Kokomo was part of the Prohibition in bootlegging...probably the backbone of most of these old country blues tunes no doubt. From his first recording for Decca on September 10, 1934 until his last on May 12, 1938, Arnold made eighty-eight sides, seven of which remain lost. Along with Peetie Wheatstraw and Bumble Bee Slim, he was a dominant figure in Chicago blues circles. His major influence upon modern music is, along with Peetie Wheatstraw, upon the seminal delta blues artist Robert Johnson, a musical contemporary. Johnson turned "Old Original Kokomo Blues" into "Sweet Home Chicago", while another Arnold song, "Sagefield Woman Blues", introduced the terminology "Dust my broom", which Johnson used as a song title himself. As you can see, most of these early blues tunes were recreated along the way by various artists. As with this tune,
there are lots of variations.
Here are the original lyrics~
to hear the original recording by Arnold, click here.
Well, I woke up this morning and I looked out the door.
I can tell that that old milk cow, I can tell the way she lowed.
Well, if you see my milk cow, please drive her on home.
'Cause, I ain't had no milk or butter since that cow's been gone.
Well, I tried to treat you right, baby, day by day.
Get out your little prayer book, get down on your knees and pray.
For you're gonna need, you're gonna need my help some day.
Well, then you're gonna be sorry for treating me this way.
Sail on, sail on, sail on, milk cow, sail on.
Sail on, sail on, sail on, milk cow, sail on.
You're gonna keep right on to sailing 'til you lose your happy home.
Well, good evening, don't that sun look good going down?
Well, believe me, don't that sun look good going down?
Well, don't that old moon look lonesome when your baby's not around?
Well, I tried everything to get along with you
I'm gonna tell you what I'm going do
I'm gonna quit my crying, I'm gonna leave you alone
If you don't believe I'm leaving You can count the days I'm gone
You ain't gonna see me, you ain't gonna see my sweet face no more.
Lord, you gonna be wondering, honey, where in this world I've gone.
In fact, I could have sworn Sleepy John Estes wrote this song first, but he just sang it. God knows there were tons of others who sang it, and who changed the tempo, to include The Kinks, Elvis Preslty made a "Rockabilly" version, Jerry Lee Lewis, Eric Clapton, for Aerosmith's Steven Tyler's version click here. , and the song was also done by Bob Dylan, Willie Nelson, The Pirates, Doc Watson, Roy Lee Parnell, Eddie Cochran...and the list goes on...
However, I hafta say, I loved Eddie's version and Aerosmith's, but I enjoyed this country blues version by George Strait, too!
Makes me want some Oreos and cold milk!
Do you know who the original belongs to? No? Well, keep reading...
The song, Milk Cow Blues, was written by James (Kokomo) Arnold and released sometime from 1934 to 1938. Kokomo was part of the Prohibition in bootlegging...probably the backbone of most of these old country blues tunes no doubt. From his first recording for Decca on September 10, 1934 until his last on May 12, 1938, Arnold made eighty-eight sides, seven of which remain lost. Along with Peetie Wheatstraw and Bumble Bee Slim, he was a dominant figure in Chicago blues circles. His major influence upon modern music is, along with Peetie Wheatstraw, upon the seminal delta blues artist Robert Johnson, a musical contemporary. Johnson turned "Old Original Kokomo Blues" into "Sweet Home Chicago", while another Arnold song, "Sagefield Woman Blues", introduced the terminology "Dust my broom", which Johnson used as a song title himself. As you can see, most of these early blues tunes were recreated along the way by various artists. As with this tune,
there are lots of variations.
Here are the original lyrics~
to hear the original recording by Arnold, click here.
Well, I woke up this morning and I looked out the door.
I can tell that that old milk cow, I can tell the way she lowed.
Well, if you see my milk cow, please drive her on home.
'Cause, I ain't had no milk or butter since that cow's been gone.
Well, I tried to treat you right, baby, day by day.
Get out your little prayer book, get down on your knees and pray.
For you're gonna need, you're gonna need my help some day.
Well, then you're gonna be sorry for treating me this way.
Sail on, sail on, sail on, milk cow, sail on.
Sail on, sail on, sail on, milk cow, sail on.
You're gonna keep right on to sailing 'til you lose your happy home.
Well, good evening, don't that sun look good going down?
Well, believe me, don't that sun look good going down?
Well, don't that old moon look lonesome when your baby's not around?
Well, I tried everything to get along with you
I'm gonna tell you what I'm going do
I'm gonna quit my crying, I'm gonna leave you alone
If you don't believe I'm leaving You can count the days I'm gone
You ain't gonna see me, you ain't gonna see my sweet face no more.
Lord, you gonna be wondering, honey, where in this world I've gone.
In fact, I could have sworn Sleepy John Estes wrote this song first, but he just sang it. God knows there were tons of others who sang it, and who changed the tempo, to include The Kinks, Elvis Preslty made a "Rockabilly" version, Jerry Lee Lewis, Eric Clapton, for Aerosmith's Steven Tyler's version click here. , and the song was also done by Bob Dylan, Willie Nelson, The Pirates, Doc Watson, Roy Lee Parnell, Eddie Cochran...and the list goes on...
However, I hafta say, I loved Eddie's version and Aerosmith's, but I enjoyed this country blues version by George Strait, too!
Time for a Little Monster Fun...
Your Monster Name is Psychotic Terror |
 You Feast On: Pickles You Lurk Around In: The Ocean You Especially Like to Torment: Your Ex's |
hahaha!
Yep, they don't call me Psychotic Terror for nuttin'!
I'd like to torment my Ex (I'm down to one!)...but he's too busy tormenting me!
after you find out, post your results in the comment section!
Inquiring blog minds wanta know if there's any more Psychotic Terrors out there! LOL
and speaking of Monsters...
Your Cute Monster Says Your Inner Demon is Greed |
 You are a very natural, real person. You're comfortable with who you are - and your spirit truly shines through. You are free of inhibitions and hang ups. Because of this freedom, you tend to be very creative. You can't help but lust after wealth and shiny objects! (so true!) People think you're cute because you are so lively. Your natural glow makes you charming. People think you're cute because you are so lively. Your natural glow makes you charming. |
okay, so I'm cute, charming, and greedy, so what? LOL
and if I don't get what I want, I can be a Psychotic Terror, too!
I hate being a charming slave, what can I say?
Where is my filthy rich Prince Charming?! Who'll rescue me from this slave trade?
I'm taking applications! LOL
Mondays...
you just can't escape 'em!
I stayed up too late last night, so everything I do feels I am doing it in slow motion. I guess I rested too much over the weekend, which interfered with a good restful sleep last night! go figure...
and today in the world of transcription today, I have encountered no major bleeps; only this...
"Despondent home is time-out and denying privileges..."
which obviously was Discipline in the home..."
good grief already! you'd think it was a Monday! lol
Cats are evil...
just look what happened to the last one...
once upon a time...
You want a funny ghost tale?
click here.
click here.
This weekend I've been rather lazy and resting way too much. I took a Flexeril for muscle aches on Friday, and I've felt hungover for two days! This is worse kind of hangover...
Anyway, speaking of ghostly tales, I tune into A&E, as they have some pretty good shows, including their show called, "I Survived." Talk about horror stories that actually happen to REAL people. Watching that show puts me in a panic mode if I hear a noise around this house, and believe me, this house is noisy! I could swear at times in this house I"m not alone, and being awakened one time by a hand or fingers that sort of raked out from my neck to my shoulder waking me out of a sound sleep, let me know that somebody was trying to get my attention!
yeah...luckily that has not happened since, I took it as being a message to see a doctor about my health at the time because I was barely functioning and sleeping all the time. I was so exhausted. My girlfriends tell me its John, that he's still here they say because he loved me so much that even death couldn't keep him away. I sometimes ponder that.
My ex-husband, John, who died of cancer in August 2006, used to come by that summer and lounge in my livingroom while I worked in the next room, my dining room. I used to tease him about dying in my lounge chair with his feet propped up. He breathed rather heavily so I would know if he stopped breathing, and I'd holler in there at times teasing him that if he died in my chair, "I'd kill him!" We laughed. He only lived for 9 months following the diagnosis. We had divorced two years before the diagnosis but had remained friends, good friends even though living together was a strain.
After 9 years in my life, I never expected him to be taken away from us. He always felt like this was his house...he was comfortable here...loved here...and he's still here I feel. His loss changed me in ways I had never thought. Outside of the rake of fingers on my shoulder, I have heard his breathing here, I know this sounds weird but true, and I have smelled his cigarette smoke on occasion. Now that I think about it, the smoke would come at times of family stress. John was always the peacemaker, hated fights, especially between me and my oldest daughter. Our relationship was and still is rather strained. However, hearing his breathing, which was all too familiar, was the absolute weirdest, and I even had to get up and go check to satisfy my own mind that I was NOT crazy!! but don't be telling people that...unless they experience things themselves they'll think you're nuts...I've had other things happen to me that I can't explain...but...
I guess I am okay with whoever might happen to inhabit my living space, as long as its not a resident evil ...but having an intruder in the middle of the night through one of my doors or windows would definitely be frightening! As a woman living alone, I have no defense. I can only hope and pray that doesn't happen, or the 'ghosts' protect me? uh...yeah...right...lol...
I need to quit watching this spooky stuff, and I will right after all the Halloween spooky specials are over! Nothing like watching the old scary favs...right? like Night of the Living Dead and Psycho, etc...or watching an Alien marathon?
Do you enjoy watching scary flicks?!
The Weekend Lounge...
Oh Lordy, I know what you're thinking...what on earth has she got blaring now?
hahaha...it's a bird, its a plane, nope! its...its...
time for Happy Hour...and listing a few things I'm happy for?
uhh...Quiet time!
No work for 2 whole days!
No family drama!
and of course blog friends and good tunes! Carry on!
Ya know, the more I listen to this chillout/lounge/house/buddha music, the more I really like it. It has to grow on you, I think. I enjoy the intricate melodies and instrumentals, but of course I am an instrumental lover, and this genre offers me anything from sensual to sacred, to upbeat, exotic, and relaxing to rejuvenating.
There are tons of this music out there, some with sultry chants and/or lyrics, and some might call it a form of new-age, but whatever they call it, I find it incredibly relaxing and perfect as background music for surfing and/or reading online.
I suppose it would be great for smaller intimate social gatherings or as mood music for a little late night candlelight encounters. oooolala! I guess you could say its a hybrid of trance, spirituality and technology!
Some like it, some hate it, some won't know until they try it! So try some of this music on for size, cruise through the list, click on a few and perhaps you'll be pleasantly surprised!
Have a great weekend everybody.
Want something else to listen to?
Check these out.
Mystical Milestones
Share
Gawd Dang Lucky Frogs
hahaha...it's a bird, its a plane, nope! its...its...
time for Happy Hour...and listing a few things I'm happy for?
uhh...Quiet time!
No work for 2 whole days!
No family drama!
and of course blog friends and good tunes! Carry on!
Ya know, the more I listen to this chillout/lounge/house/buddha music, the more I really like it. It has to grow on you, I think. I enjoy the intricate melodies and instrumentals, but of course I am an instrumental lover, and this genre offers me anything from sensual to sacred, to upbeat, exotic, and relaxing to rejuvenating.
There are tons of this music out there, some with sultry chants and/or lyrics, and some might call it a form of new-age, but whatever they call it, I find it incredibly relaxing and perfect as background music for surfing and/or reading online.
I suppose it would be great for smaller intimate social gatherings or as mood music for a little late night candlelight encounters. oooolala! I guess you could say its a hybrid of trance, spirituality and technology!
Some like it, some hate it, some won't know until they try it! So try some of this music on for size, cruise through the list, click on a few and perhaps you'll be pleasantly surprised!
Have a great weekend everybody.
Want something else to listen to?
Check these out.
Mystical Milestones
Share
Gawd Dang Lucky Frogs
What In Tarnation?! a few notes on my day...
On first glance of this report, I had to line up the entire right side columns which included the patient name, SS#, Date of Exam, blah, blah, everything was misaligned. Who typed this? I go look at the initials and *Gasp* ... that would explain it...In fact, one heading was totally omitted!
Keep reading...
Next comes the actual patient information. While checking for this, we open the patient input details box...however the MT pretty much skipped this part and obviously manually types the stuff on the actual first page of the report. Surely by looking at page #2 she would realize that any information that she did not put in the patient details box would not show up on the 2nd page or 3rd, or however many pages, and what information she did put in, even in the wrong boxes would not be on the headers either. This seems to be a fairly regular occurrence with this particular MT.
Keep reading... "Do you have to?....Yes!"
They did not capitalize the patient's name in the input box, but did capitalize it manually on the document. A no-no cause on the 2nd page header and all the way through the report headers it will show up as not being capitalized (which is mandatory)! same thing with SS#! If you put it in the wrong spot, no matter if its on the first page if you typed it in manually, it will not show up on subsequent pages! Same thing goes for the actual date of service! This is a big no-no!
I know you wanta bail...it's too long to read?...
Each MT does have written instructions to refer to on what exactly goes where in the input patient details box, and this is not this MT's first rodeo! This is one set of initials whom I have QA’d numerous times for the same infractions...over and over, and over and over and over again!
Gotta keep reading now...it's gonna get better...
SO....after I fix all the patient input details box stuff...
..and I have lined up everything on the right side to include adding the omitted one ... (the left side is reserved for doctor information, addy, etc.) in case yuns were wondering...
THEN comes the fun part, 23 minutes of reading! and with those initials, I knew I was in for a treat and it's not even Halloween yet! I feel tricked, and I'll need a treat after this one...
okay, okay...back to the story...but first let me say...
Folks, this is not a foreign doctor; this dictator is all-American, psychologist, who talks very well, slurs absolutely nothing.
To my horror, in the first 3 or 4 sentences, omitted were the words “date, purple blouse," and a whole sentence dictated as “Her attitude was serious.” Also throughout this report, things were capitalized that should not have been; some things not capitalized and should have been...ugh!
Typos also included...
Typing poor for proof (referring to 'proof' of identification)….
Ms. So-N-So reports today that she was placed "On a side board when I was four - and then again when I was six...."
Side board? What in tarnation?
actually it was dictated as “psyche ward” (it seems Ms. So-N-So was a crazy-assed kid, too! MT had something else typed here but I don't recall what it was only that I fixed it, and while these are some errors, there were others!)
in attendance in nature...
dictated as "inattentive" (talking about type of ADHD)
dour should have been typed as four.
She began saying that to staff at Seneca Health Services...
dictated as “began seeing staff”
Misspelled 'Dr. Urick' all through this report as Dr. Uric; the dictating Dr. had spelled this too!
Her primary care physician was Zombie (LOL) at the Camblin Health Clinic;
huh? I had to giggle at this one!
'was Zombie' dictated by doctor as "will soon be at" and the "clinic name is totally misspelled here and didn't even include the word Health!"
They are consistent with her ability scores spelled this date.
'spelled' dictated as “found”
She is leaving her mother soon, once a week to go shopping...huh?
actually dictated as “mother’s home”
Axis III Seizure Disorder, Left Leg Syndrome – by the Claimant report.
‘diagnoses are not to be capitalized on Axis III; however Left Leg Syndrome was dictated as "restless legs syndrome”
report no symptoms for the poor criteria
"no" should have been typed “enough” and 'poor' should have been typed “full” …same sentence here. and don't forget to add an 's" on report!
diagnosis is being made by solely on my interview
dictated as is being made 'based' solely on my interview.
and the best kicker of my day~~
The MT typed, I can’t tolerate or face anymore...
I don't think I can tolerate or face anymore reports today typed by YOU!!!
In actuality...the doctor actually dictated (instead of I can't tolerate or face anymore)...
as I can't “hunt or fish” anymore!!!
and this is just one report in my day, folks!
How was your day?
...and that's when the fight started...
My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed.
I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?" "No," she answered.
I then said, "Is that your final answer?" She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying "Yes."
So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
And that's when the fight started....
I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?"
It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.
"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.
So I suggested, "How about the kitchen?"
And that's when the fight started....
Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, and
slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage,turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day.
I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, 'The weather out there is terrible.' My loving wife of 10 years replied, 'Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?'
and that's when the fight started ...
A man and a woman were asleep like two innocent babies. Suddenly, at 3 o'clock in the morning, a loud noise came from outside. The woman, bewildered, jumped up from the bed and yelled at the man 'HolyS***. That must be my husband!'
So the man jumped out of the bed; scared and naked jumped out the window. He smashed himself on the ground, ran through a thorn bush and to his car as fast as he could go. A few minutes later he returned and went up to the bedroom and screamed at the woman, 'I AM your husband!'
The woman yelled back, 'Yeah, then why were you running?'
And that's when the fight started.....
I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for $14.95.
Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95. I told her the beer would make her look better at night than the cold cream.
And what's when the fight started....
A woman was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She was not happy with what she saw and said to her husband, 'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'
The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.'
And that's when the fight started.....
I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first. "I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please." He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?"" Nah, she can order for herself."
And that's when the fight started...
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept
staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table. My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'
'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.'
'My God!' said my wife, 'who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'
And that's when the fight started...
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social
Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.
The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt.' So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application.
When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too.'
And that's when the fight started...
When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive... so, I took her to a gas station.
And that's when the fight started...
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.
She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.'
I bought her a scale.
And that's when the fight started...
My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, 'What's on TV?'
I said, 'Dust.'
And that's when the fight started...
I'm sure most of you have heard these before, but have a great day!
I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?" "No," she answered.
I then said, "Is that your final answer?" She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying "Yes."
So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
And that's when the fight started....
I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?"
It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.
"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.
So I suggested, "How about the kitchen?"
And that's when the fight started....
Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, and
I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, 'The weather out there is terrible.' My loving wife of 10 years replied, 'Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?'
and that's when the fight started ...
So the man jumped out of the bed; scared and naked jumped out the window. He smashed himself on the ground, ran through a thorn bush and to his car as fast as he could go. A few minutes later he returned and went up to the bedroom and screamed at the woman, 'I AM your husband!'
The woman yelled back, 'Yeah, then why were you running?'
And that's when the fight started.....
I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for $14.95.
Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95. I told her the beer would make her look better at night than the cold cream.
And what's when the fight started....
The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.'
And that's when the fight started.....
I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first. "I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please." He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?"" Nah, she can order for herself."
And that's when the fight started...
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept
staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table. My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'
'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.'
'My God!' said my wife, 'who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'
And that's when the fight started...
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social
Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.
When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too.'
And that's when the fight started...
When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive... so, I took her to a gas station.
And that's when the fight started...
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.
She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.'
I bought her a scale.
My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, 'What's on TV?'
I said, 'Dust.'
And that's when the fight started...
I'm sure most of you have heard these before, but have a great day!
Today In The World of Transcription and Beyond...
Monday again, already?? Since starting this new Quality Control phase of my job instead of typing, I am never amazed by the lack of serious grammar, basic sentence structure, and/or punctuation skills, and the real skill...you know, the ability to follow directions!!!
if I told those MTs once, I told them a blue-billion times...to put this information in this box in this particular...quotations go outside the punctuation...oh I give up! and how many times must I go to pull up a doctor's patient roster list for a particular date only to find there is no roster for that doctor on that particular day, or that all too wonderful error that says "This file is not a recognizable format." What? Damnit. Same rerun, different day. I ask you Blogdom, how am I to do my job properly as to verify names and/or medical record numbers, or to even insure that is the correct date, much less the type of report, procedure, followup, clinic note, etc...if somebody else doesn't do their job?...ugh! if I were in charge heads would roll...if you can't do your job, there's the door, and by the way, you are way past your 3rd strike whoever you are.
Yep, today I woke up with a headache from hell, blinked at the screen half asleep, eyes squinted, wanting to scream, noooooooo! and the thought occurred to me to just call in dead...wouldn't that be the perfect day to call in dead? Mondays? especially in my line of work. When I sign off the frequency, more than likely it will be on one of my 'off' days, that'll piss me off, as it should be on a Monday!
In my muddled state today, I hear a urology doctor dictates what sounds like, and the MT types, "He has been out of the steam baths and taking Fertile One. I can't laugh at that one, cause I found myself a little stumped frankly...as there is such a thing as a bother score on a rectal exam too...so I am thinking ...what is this? uh...for one thing, the sentence structure does not even make sense, and I don't think that is what he is saying here, however, I am not sure I know what he wants or slurred in here, but I sure as heck ain't leavin' my initials or sending a report back to this doctor with steam baths typed anywhere in it, so I leave a blank for it!
Interestingly though, I do learn quite a bit. For example, like today. Doctor dictated that most men who suffer from erectile dysfunction difficulties could have undiagnosed cardiac disease, as this can be a early sign of heart problems. Of course, that is merely perhaps only one cause, as this can certainly be multifactorial. However, it has also come to my attention that even penises who can't get erect on their own accord due to whatever cause has interfered with its ability to stand up and demand attention...it can be given an injection with good results! and if oral medications are not treating the erectile dysfunction properly then the patient can do injections or try a pump? sometimes this stuff conjures up weird imagery as I listen to these doctors. Yes, today an erection occurred right before my very eyes! Well, not exactly...
and the doctor did warn the patient if his erection should last for more than 3 hours? (I am not kidding) that he should come back immediately to get that resolved, and/or have his injectable dosage decreased. Can't you just imagine that scenario when the patient leaves his office and gets home? "Honey, I'm home...I brought you a gift..." a 3-hour woody? She might not be so thrilled! Are you sure that's a good idea, really? esp. for older men coz I'm thinking if erectile dysfunction is a precursor for heart problems, then giving them an aerobic workout...well, you see my point.
Yes, Urology takes penises and twats into serious consideration, as they should, and are totally a matter-of-fact about it. I have learned far more than I needed to know.
While out cruising around Blogger, and upon visiting Madame, I had to burst out laffing and still am. She is one of the joys here at Blogger...as are most of you whom I have connected with, so skedattle on over and enjoy her post by clicking here.
Grass Snakes Harmless? Read on...
Garden Grass Snakes also known as Garter Snakes (Thamnophissirtalis) can be dangerous. Yes, grass snakes, not rattlesnakes. Here's why.
A couple in Sweetwater, Texas, had a lot of potted plants. During a recent cold spell, the wife was bringing a lot of them indoors to protect them from a possible freeze.
It turned out that a little green garden grass snake was hidden in one of the plants. When it had warmed up, it slithered out and the wife saw it go under the sofa.
She let out a very loud scream.
The husband (who was taking a shower) ran out into the living room naked to see what the problem was. She told him there was a snake under the sofa. He got down on the floor on his hands and knees to look for it. About that time the family dog came and cold-nosed him on the behind. He thought the snake had bitten him, so he screamed and fell over on the floor.
His wife thought he had had a heart attack, so she covered him up, told him to lie still and called an ambulance. The attendants rushed in, would not listen to his protests, loaded him on the stretcher, and started carrying him out.
About that time, the snake came out from under the sofa and the Emergency Medical Technician saw it and dropped his end of the stretcher. That's when the man broke his leg and why he is still in the hospital.
The wife still had the problem of the snake in the house, so she called on a neighbor who volunteered to capture the snake. He armed himself with a rolled-up newspaper and began poking under the couch. Soon he decided it was gone and told the woman, who sat down on the sofa in relief. But while relaxing, her hand dangled in between the cushions, where she felt the snake wriggling around.
She screamed and fainted, the snake rushed back under the sofa.
The neighbor man, seeing her lying there passed out, tried to use CPR to revive her. The neighbor's wife, who had just returned from shopping at the grocery store, saw her husband's mouth on the woman's mouth and slammed her husband in the back of the head with a bag of canned goods, knocking him out and cutting his scalp to a point where it needed stitches.
The noise woke the woman from her dead faint and she saw her neighbor lying on the floor with his wife bending over him, so she assumed that the snake had bitten him. She went to the kitchen and got a small bottle of whiskey, and began pouring it down the man's throat.
By now, the police had arrived. Breathe here.....
They saw the unconscious man, smelled the whiskey, and assumed that a drunken fight had occurred. They were about to arrest them all, when the women tried to explain how it all happened over a little green snake.
The police called an ambulance, which took away the neighbor and his sobbing wife.
Now, the little snake again crawled out from under the sofa and one of the policemen drew his gun and fired at it. He missed the snake and hit the leg of the end table. The table fell over, the lamp on it shattered and, as the bulb broke, it started a fire in the drapes.
The other policeman tried to beat out the flames, and fell through the window into the yard on top of the family dog who, startled, jumped out and raced into the street, where an oncoming car swerved to avoid it and smashed into the parked police car.
Meanwhile, neighbors saw the burning drapes and called in the fire department. The firemen had started raising the fire ladder when they were halfway down the street. The rising ladder tore out the overhead wires, put out the power, and disconnected the telephones in a ten-square city block area (but they did get the house fire out).
Time passed! Both men were discharged from the hospital, the house was repaired, the dog came home, the police acquired a new car and all was right with their world.
A while later they were watching TV and the weatherman announced a cold snap for that night. The wife asked her husband if he thought they should bring in their plants for the night.
And that's when he shot her.
hahaha, and you think you're having a bad day?
By the way, I got this in an email...I don't know who the actual author is; however it is a quite funny and dramatic story, isn't it?
Nighthawks At The Diner...
Who wants to be a Nighthawk? sit around The Diner,
order up some coffee,
hashbrowns & eggs over easy,
and a side order of toast!
Come on in all you nighthawks, gypsies and insomniacs! Gather around the coffee urn tonight and lets make it a late nighter… I think for me…tonight I’ll have me some eggs over easy, some bacon (not too crisp), and a side order of toast! Yep, that’ll be perfect…
“So, what’ll it be for you, sugar?”
*the voice recorded message player and the chat have been taken down, but it sure was nice to put a voice to the blog face* and always nice to interact with my blog friends. If you weren't here, you should have been...but there's always a next time!*
Enjoy this diner scene from Jim Jarmusch's "Coffee and Cigarettes". It's so uncomfortably wonderful!
If you would like to listen to the previously posted Tom Waits playlist to include songs off his "Nighthawks at the Diner" you can find it by clicking here.
Big thanks to those who came to hang out at The Diner. Everybody is welcome to come hang out and chat and meet other bloggers here at my site or at the music site. I'll post a notice of when and which blog it'll be, preferably over at the music site. I'd love to see more Blogger friends come in and chat. I also hope you guys check the other links on the music site!
kissy-kissy II
"When a person gets kissed for the first time, they fall down, and they don't get up for at least an hour." -- Wendy, age 8
"You should never kiss a girl unless you have enough bucks to buy her a big ring and her own VCR, 'cause she'll want to have videos of the wedding." -- Jim, age 10
"Never kiss in front of other people. It's a big embarrassing thing if anybody sees you. But if nobody sees you, I might be willing to try it with a handsome boy, but just for a few hours." -- Kally, age 9
"You learn [how to kiss] right on the spot when the gooshy feelings get the best of you." -- Doug, age 7
"If it's your mother, you can kiss her anytime. But if it's a new person, you have to ask permission." -- Roger, age 6
"It's never okay to kiss a boy. They always slobber all over you. That's why I stopped doing it." -- Tammy, age 10
"I know one reason kissing was created. It makes you feel warm all over, and they didn't always have electric heat or fireplaces or even stoves in their houses." -- Gina, age 8
"The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that." -- Curt, age 7
"The rules goes like this: if you kiss someone, then you should marry her and have kids with her. It's the right thing to do." -- Howard, age 8
(on seeing a couple kissing) "He is trying to steal her chewing gum!" -- Boy, age 6
Kissy-Kissy...
I have no idea why this is on my mind per se, but I'm sure we've all been asked at some point if we had a fantasy or two...
Right now hitting the lotto would be a great fantasy come true, huh?! Fat chance that will happen...
I'd love the fantasy of waking up and actually having a car to drive!
but romantical-wise and all...
When it comes to fantasies ...
I am just a bit embarrassed to admit that I fantasize about kissing most often.
Remembered kisses, missed kisses, anticipated kisses.
Oh, I imagine other things too ~
But mostly, it is all about the kiss...
... if you got love, kiss 'em lots! and have a great weekend, Bloggers.
If You Forget Me...
I love this poem by Pablo Neruda, and if you click here you can listen to this poem being read by Madonna with a musical score from The Postman/II Postino in the background composed by Luis Bacalov! It is an absolutely gorgeous composition ~ Enjoy!
If you forget me
I want you to know one thing
You know how this is...
If I look at the crystal moon
At the red branch of the slow autumn at my window
If I touch near the fire the impalpable ash
Or the wrinkled body of the log
Everything carries me to you
As if everything that exists - aromas, light, metals
Were little boats that sail toward those isles of yours that wait for me
Well, now
If little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you, little by little.
If suddenly you forget me
Do not look for me
For I shall already have forgotten you.
If you think it long and mad the wind of banners that passes through my life
And you decide to leave me at the shore of the heart where I have roots
Remember.... that on that day, at that hour
I shall lift my arms, and my roots will set off to seek another land
But...if each day, each hour
You feel that you are destined for me with implacable sweetness
If each day a flower climbs up to your lips to seek me
Ahh my love, ahh my own
In me all that fire is repeated
In me nothing is extinguished or forgotten
My love feeds on your love, beloved
And as long as you live it will be in your arms
Without leaving mine.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Here's a video made from the Italian movie "Il Postino", starring Massimo Troisi and Philippe Noiret. The background music is a poem by Pablo Neruda read by Andy García, called "Tonight I Can Write The Saddest Lines".
Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
Write for example, 'The night is shattered
and the blue stars shiver in the distance.'
The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.
Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.
Through nights like this one I held her in my arms.
I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.
She loved me, sometimes I loved her too.
How could one not have loved her great still eyes.
Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her.
To hear immense night, still more immense without her.
And the verse falls to the soul like dew to a pasture.
What does it matter that my love could not keep her.
The night is shattered and she is not with me.
This is all. In the distance someone is singing. In the distance.
My soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.
My sight searches for her as though to go to her.
My heart looks for her, and she is not with me.
The same night whitening the same trees.
We, of that time, are no longer the same.
I no longer love her, that's certain, but how I loved her.
My voice tried to find the wind to touch her hearing.
Another's. She will be another's. Like my kisses before.
Her voice. Her bright body. Her infinite eyes.
I no longer love her, that's certain, but maybe I love her.
Love is short, forgetting is so long.
Because through nights like this one I held her in my arms
my soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.
Though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer
and these the last verses that I write for her.
*more poetry by Pablo Neruda*
I want you to know one thing
You know how this is...
If I look at the crystal moon
At the red branch of the slow autumn at my window
If I touch near the fire the impalpable ash
Or the wrinkled body of the log
Everything carries me to you
As if everything that exists - aromas, light, metals
Were little boats that sail toward those isles of yours that wait for me
Well, now
If little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you, little by little.
If suddenly you forget me
Do not look for me
For I shall already have forgotten you.
If you think it long and mad the wind of banners that passes through my life
And you decide to leave me at the shore of the heart where I have roots
Remember.... that on that day, at that hour
I shall lift my arms, and my roots will set off to seek another land
But...if each day, each hour
You feel that you are destined for me with implacable sweetness
If each day a flower climbs up to your lips to seek me
Ahh my love, ahh my own
In me all that fire is repeated
In me nothing is extinguished or forgotten
My love feeds on your love, beloved
And as long as you live it will be in your arms
Without leaving mine.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
Write for example, 'The night is shattered
and the blue stars shiver in the distance.'
The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.
Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.
Through nights like this one I held her in my arms.
I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.
She loved me, sometimes I loved her too.
How could one not have loved her great still eyes.
Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her.
To hear immense night, still more immense without her.
And the verse falls to the soul like dew to a pasture.
What does it matter that my love could not keep her.
The night is shattered and she is not with me.
This is all. In the distance someone is singing. In the distance.
My soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.
My sight searches for her as though to go to her.
My heart looks for her, and she is not with me.
The same night whitening the same trees.
We, of that time, are no longer the same.
I no longer love her, that's certain, but how I loved her.
My voice tried to find the wind to touch her hearing.
Another's. She will be another's. Like my kisses before.
Her voice. Her bright body. Her infinite eyes.
I no longer love her, that's certain, but maybe I love her.
Love is short, forgetting is so long.
Because through nights like this one I held her in my arms
my soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.
Though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer
and these the last verses that I write for her.
*more poetry by Pablo Neruda*
Beat the Flu with Onion Therapy?
I got this email from someone, which is a little story about beating the flu, and it worked for her, she said. Here goes...
In 1919 when the flu killed 40 million people there was this doctor that supposedly visited with many farmers to see if he could help them combat the flu. Many of the farmers and their family had contracted it and many died.
The doctor came upon this one farmer and to his surprise, everyone was very healthy. When the doctor asked what the farmer was doing that was different the wife replied that she had placed an unpeeled onion in a dish in the rooms of the home, (probably only two rooms back then?). The doctor couldn't believe it and asked if he could have one of the onions and placed it under the microscope. She gave him one and when he did this, he did find the flu virus in the onion. It obviously absorbed the virus, therefore, keeping the family healthy.
Now, somewhere somebody heard a similar story from a hairdresser in AZ. She said that several years ago many of her employees were coming down with the flu and so were many of her customers. So, the next year she placed several bowls with onions around in her shop. To her surprise, none of her staff got sick. It must work, right? (And no, she is not in the onion business!)
The moral of the story (perhaps its a tall tale) is buy some onions and place them in bowls around your home. If you work at a desk, place one or two in your office or under your desk or even on top somewhere. I'm sure you employer will be thrilled to have onions everywhere...LOL...(just don't tell him you heard it here). So try it and see what happens, let me know. After all, if this helps you and your loved ones from getting sick, all the better. What have you got to lose, eh? A few bucks on onions?!
Got Music?
If you're in the mood for Steve Vai, Buddy Guy & The Stones, or BB King click here. I love to have contributors, so drop me an email!
Perhaps you prefer a great classic rock oldie? or two...then by all means click here.
In need a little Southern Rock Comfort? or Rhinobucket? Check this out.
Want Loverboy? or a drum solo by Neil Peart? it's awesome...click here.
Like a Mystery? Click and go.
Island surfing? click here.
A New Zealand twist? Check out Joe.
Miss my MeanGreen 70s machines? or my PinkPod? to find them click here.
wave riding...
The ocean flows by timeless;
Without any end, without any beginning.
Always watching, always waiting.
Its ever changing moods passing swiftly,
Calm and then raging,
Both flirting across the space of a minute.
Mirroring ages, people and time;
A lifetime of a person, whether high or low,
Makes no dent in that wide space of nothingness
with the deep wisdom of forever.
Laws, acts, years and eras;
Come and then go, without record.
Our loves and losses are not noticed when measured
against the vastness of its depths.
Unconquerable, unfathomable it flows;
A teardrops length from hell and a raindrops width from heaven.
how little our desires; how worthless our dreams.
For we are gone in but a second;
The oceans flow on regardless.
Got Music?
If you're in the mood for Steve Vai, Buddy Guy & The Stones, or BB King click here.
Perhaps you prefer a great classic rock oldie? or two...then by all means click here.
In need a little Southern Rock Comfort? Rhinobucket? Check this out.
Want Loverboy? or a drum solo by Neil Peart? it's awesome...click here.
A little bit of soul and oldtown funk? Here ya go.
Island surfing? click here.
A New Zealand twist? Check out Joe.
Miss my MeanGreen 70s machines? or my PinkPod? to find them click here.
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