Friday 13th?

Don't be surprised! It could be a lucky day, right?!

Never know what tomorrow brings, and some people are superstitious about Friday 13th. This will be the 3rd time we have had a Friday 13th fall this year I believe. Its weird how it comes 3x in one year and only once last year and next year.

I am hoping that tomorrow is a lucky day for me, and those boys actually get my car fixed and returned back to me!

As for work, I've just been a little tired, haven't felt good this week, but I'll bounce back. No really good QA quirks except today I was reading this report, and read, "He enjoys teaching Marshall Arts"...wait, my eyes kept reading but my brain wouldn't wrap itself around that "marshall" ... that ain't right!

Well, I guess I'll take my "Marshall Arts" skills out there and kick butt if I don't get my car here soon! I have been way too patient for way too long. I called that guy today, I told him to give me a date that he will absolutely have my car done at the very latest. He promised me coming Wednesday and hoped to get it to me before that. I hate feeling jerked around. Next time I call out there he is going to know that I know people in 'low places' and/or 'high places' too, and I'm not afraid to use 'em.

Heard this one?

Three businessmen were sitting in a bar, drinking and discussing how stupid their wives were. Jerks!

The first says, “I tell you, my wife is so stupid.  Last week she went to the supermarket and bought $300 bucks worth of meat because it was on sale and we don’t even have a fridge big enough to keep it in!” (ungrateful jerk let him starve!)

The second one agrees she must be pretty dense, but says his wife is worse.  He says, “Just last week she went out an spent $17,000 bucks on a new car,” and laments she can’t even drive!” (always thinks males are superior drivers, jerk #2)

The third blonde-headed guy nods his head and agreed that both these women sound like they have stupid tattooed across their foreheads! but stated his wife is even dumber.  “I have to laugh when I think about it,” he chuckles.

"Last week she left on a vacation to Greece. I watched her packing her bags and she must have taken at least five boxes of condoms with her, and she doesn’t even have a penis!” (stupid-assed jerk but he's blonde!, okay...)

by the way, bloggers, head on over to the lounge and cast your vote on 70s toxic or treasure tune, by clicking here.

Putting Your Affairs In Order...

The doctor, after an examination, sighed and said, 'I've some bad news. You have cancer, and you'd best put your affairs in order.'

The woman was shocked, but managed to compose herself and walk into the waiting room where her daughter had been waiting.

Well, daughter, we women celebrate when things are good, and we celebrate when things don't go so well. In this case, things aren't well. I have cancer. Let's head to the club and have a martini.

After 3 or 4 martinis, the two were feeling a little less somber. There were some laughs and more martinis. They were eventually approached by some of the woman's old friends, who were curious as to what the two were celebrating.

The woman told her friends they were drinking to her impending end. I've been diagnosed with AIDS. The friends were aghast, gave the woman their condolences and beat a hasty retreat.

After the friends left, the woman's daughter leaned over and whispered, Momma, I thought you said you were dying of cancer, and you just told your friends you were dying of AIDS! Why did you do that??

Because I don't want any of those bitches sleeping with your father after I'm gone.

And THAT, my friends, is what is called, 'Putting Your Affairs in Order'!

Bare...

Long summer nights are all but a distant memory

as now winter looms near.

The radiant beams of a sun once hot

has nearly all but disappeared.

The flowers that bloomed are now in slumber

and birds have fled their nests.

The trees are bare with naked bark

their leaves have fallen off one by one to the ground.

Today I ventured out into my leaf landscaped front yard to clean it up. All around me the trees were bare, the sun was nice, a beautiful day. I realized upon closer inspection that my rake was broken, so I couldn't get the job done. My neighbor had a couple of other neighbors down who lived down the block picking up her leaves (which have become mine also) so they offered to do my yard as well. Hope you guys have had a nice weekend.

Mondays come way too quick for me.

By the way, if anybody has tried to stop by my music hangout, I had a setting messed up, my apologies. Here's the link, feel free to come on over to The Lounge

Simon's Cat...

 These are the funniest videos, and if you haven't seen them, you should! This cat is always hungry and loves to give subtle hints to his loving master. 

If you'd like to find out more information about the author/animator, click here.

Need an alarm clock? nah, just get a pet! This video is actually the first video that Simon Tofield did. 



I always like this one...but this "fly" one is hilarious! and just like a darn cat! LOL 

Today in the land of "twats-and-whatnots"

(that's short for urology) I just about fell out of my chair laffing on this one.

"The patient complains of difficulty with urination and perennial pain."

 You mean its seasonal? hahaha! (should be 'perineal' relating to between the legs)

Ole Frank here could suffer some perennial pain if she whacks him with that book she's trying to read!  




shame on you Frank!    

and the other belly laugh I got today was reading this sentence,

“He gets along well with his living girlfriend."   

  

Staff Meeting...

Today I was back on urology reports mostly all day long.  Over the weekend one of my Blogstream friends had posted this joke, and I thought it was hilarious, and worth another laugh on this long Monday! it's been another day in the land of penises and twats, and all that rot!  


and here comes the joke, here comes the joke...

The boss of a Madison Avenue advertising agency called a spontaneous staff meeting in the middle of a particularly stressful week. (This is one pretty sharp boss!)

When everyone gathered, the boss, who understood the benefits of having fun, told the burnt-out staff the purpose of the meeting was to have a quick contest.

The theme ~ Viagra advertising slogans.

The only rule was they had to use past ad slogans, originally written for other products that captured the essence of Viagra. Slight variations were acceptable.

About 7 minutes later, they turned in their suggestions and created a Top 10 List. With all the laughter and camaraderie, the rest of the week went very well for everyone!


The Top 10 were:

10. Viagra … Whaazzzz up!

9. Viagra … The quicker pecker picker upper.

8. Viagra … Like a rock!

7. Viagra … When it absolutely, positively has to be there overnight.

6. Viagra … Be all that you can be.

5. Viagra… Reach out and touch someone.

4. Viagra … Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman.

3. Viagra … Home of the whopper!

2. Viagra … We bring good things to Life!

And the unanimous #1 slogan:

This is your pee-pee. This is your pee-pee on drugs.

hahaha!    =))

O'Class...The Teacher Is In...

Today's lesson is all about Orgasms...

Orgasms? Are you kidding? 



Well, I never! I am not going to watch that!

I know, I know...after the Creepy Doll thing, I felt I should at least have a Halloween day after shocker?!

Okay, don't fake that you didn't watch it now!      



ain't I a stinker?!