Ms. Golden Hair Surprise...

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Good Evening.

A strange thing happened here at the Palace. I have talked to all three of my children within the last 24 hours. When I look at the caller ID and I see it is my son or daughter (both grown) I often cringe thinking "Oh, God, what now?" ... I know, I know ... I must be a terrible mother! But believe me, it is a strange occurrence indeed, Blogdom. As you may well know, I have three children; two of which are grown and supposedly are making it out on their own; and the youngest and I have an online relationship through the week, and are weekend warriors in real life, as she lives with her father and stepmother, and foster siblings. She hates having foster kids in the home, so she tells me nearly every weekend, but now has a new foster sister who is 13 and they were having a big time tonight in her room! and of course we were all playing on the Instant Messenger! Speaking of which her dad reads our conversations. She is a good kid and I trust her 100% on the computer. He is just a snoop. As parents, we know when our kids need monitored, but his goes far beyond the "normal" parental concern, but that is another fairytale story in a Ex-Kingdom best not traveled to presently.

It never fails that Griszelda Mess always calls when I am working! and truly do not have the time to sit and gab but I always try to listen, as she needs a sounding board most times. Usually I mark my time down and just forget taking that much needed break or make the time up by working a little over to compensate. She called this morning going off on a tangent stating that she does not know how long she can put up with this working evening turn 4 to midnight ... and how Lord Spoiled she feels is not handling the household in the evenings and attending to her children's needs, especially little Queenie who is 5, and Sir Wyatt who is 17 months of age. I do understand her concern as a mother and sympathize with her.

She says Lord Spoiled does not care about anything except the MONEY issue, and I know him well enough to say this is probably true. She tells me that she is ready to quit this job, as family is more important and her kids need her home. She says that little Queenie is acting out as Lord Spoiled does not spend any time with her on her homework or in general, and his idea of discipline is raising his voice to intimidate, and spanking the kids. My little Queenie is already having to adjust to a new school and surroundings, but now is without her mom home in the evenings, and feels lost. I told Griszelda before she took this job that at their ages she would be better to opt for perhaps a lower paying job out of her particular field for a while and of course look for a day turn job and maybe even a part time one. The job she currently has is a 4 to midnight shift at a hospital doing phlebotomy work, and getting a change in shift is not an option at this point. I don't know what will happen on this saga, but I am sure I will find out.

My son, Prince Bryan, who lives in the city of Wellington, in a cabin in the woods in the boondocks, called me from his work last night after 11:30 p.m. from the prison. He is a guard at LaGrange in Lousville, Kentucky. He only works 3 nights a week since he has to travel to his jobsite. It seems he needed someone to talk to. He was having "girl" issues. As his Queen Mother, of course, I advised him right away that all women were evil, and he should best avoid them! Well, I did try to listen to his concerns and voice to him my advice. It seems he has been a little depressed lately due to the death of his best friend in the whole world. Dying from stupidity he says of taking too much prescription drugs and mixing them with alcohol. If that was not bad enough someone broke into his cabin and stole nearly everything he had (even his clothing) while he was working at the prison, and even left the doors wide open and his beloved dogs running wild. This kid loves his dogs. They are his children. They even took his satellite dish which was later recovered!

Obviously he could not get to sleep last night worrying about a situation with a girl he has known for eight months now. I am not sure where this relationship is going, but I am worried that he did not need this concern on top of all the recent stuff going on in his life. He said she wanted "alone time." He tells me he is lonely. I did find out that he is actually living just under a 2 hour drive from me, so I just might have to pack up and go see this child of mine that I haven't seen him since Christmas last year. Oh, I take that back, maybe once for a few minutes when he was passing through months ago. Yes, the Queen might be making a trip into Wellington but somehow I do not think they will be rolling out the red carpet at the Red Roof Inn, as there are no accommodations there! It seems when it rains, it pours, does it not? and that is the news from the Kingdom of Yours Truly ...

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and how is life in your Kingdom?


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My! How Time Flies...

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I can't believe it is November already. I don't know where fall went to. Last I recall it was summer in Cincinatti, me and the millionaire, were having a great time in the city! Once home I feel like I've done nothing but work. The gardener has shied away but continued to mow my lawn, and even came this past week and blew leaves and raked my entire yard. He and I talk on the phone more than anything; he sure has the gift of gab and it is like talking to a girl! We've gone "junking" but not much else; no more dates! and no kisses from the gardener and that's the way I prefer it. I am happily in lust over my millionaire baby. After the gardener and I had a long talk about this "love" thing, boundaries have been established and he and are are cool with that, or at least I think. I have to to tell you, he is a bit odd.

In one of our many phone conversations he was bitching because his do-less brother moved in on him this summer. His brother is a 50-something-year-old jailbird and chronic dope smoker, and pretty much an all-around dope, who only works when he is forced to. The gardener took him in because he did not want him on the streets, or so he says. Anyway, it seems his brother used his holy "cookware" which was in the kitchen on the stove and hanging on a rack above the stove, to cook with, and the gardener had a fit! He says he does not cook in his kitchen, he does not like the mess, and those "pots & pans" were just for show??

WTF? is what I'm thinking. (the gardener continues)... "You know, how people will put things out ... or display items just for show but they don't really use?" I'm thinking at this point this guy has issues ... seriously and I am trying not to laugh outloud! Not only did his brother screw with his pan collection, but he also made a big fat royal mess in HIS kitchen! God forbid somebody cook in his kitchen!!! Yeah, well, that's not the first time I got an incling that he pretty much does the "show game." His car is impeccably washed all the time, and he probably has a fetish with the bathroom hand towel hanging at a certain level or a certain way. I couldn't help but laugh over his rant about the pots and pans!!! I can't handle that mentality in a man. I've discovered littel quirks like that over the course of our "yardship!" and like I said, he's pretty to look at, but definitely not my cup of java! LOL

On the homefront, Griszelda Mess and Lord Spoiled have survived six months of not being within a stone's throw of the palace! Amazing! I certainly do not miss being trespassed against! I hope that living on their own away from any family support has taught them a few lessons. Lord Spoiled's mom and dad continue to spoil him with extra money instead of the teaching themselves to budget. It burns my ass, but what do you do? I am supposed to ride down Thanksgiving weekend with these in-law people and I will surely have to bite my tongue, or take a Greyhound bus back home! That should prove to be an interesting trip to say the least!

Speaking of Griszelda Mess (my daughter whose 28), called and woke me up at midnight the other night. Asking me if I had heard from Queenie (who is 5) or Lord Spoiled (her hubby), as he was supposed to come and pick her up from work but she could not reach him on the cellphone. Had he fallen asleep and she was stuck at the hospital? and what if anything could Your Majesty, Queen Blogship do about that? After all, I'm 7 hours away for God sakes, snug in my bed, with visions of sex running rampant in my head! and why the interruption? calling me up at midnight, waking me from my twilight, and for what I ask you again Blogdom? Is that not the stupidest?? I swear I did not drop this child on her head as an infant, nor did I abuse drugs when I carried her in utero ...

That is about as bad as the time a while back she called me stuck at the side of the road broken down like I could fix that, too? She needed somebody to vent to at that time because her less than mechanically inclined husband never services their vehicles which is worrisome to me. My advice to her. Demand he service the vehicles every change of season or 1000 miles. I am sure she gave him a good bitch, after all she wears the pants in that family!

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nothing says lovin' like a good bitchin'~huh fairy godmother?!!


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Forgive me Blogdom for I have sinned. *insert frown here.* It has been a while since my last confession I see, once again.

However~!~

Let us mark Today as a glorious occasion here at the palace for Yours Truly, the Queen. Griszelda Mess (no longer a mess, or is she?) started a new phlebotomy job today at the local hospital there in Princeton...

and my youngest daughter, Princess Golden Hair, started her journey into womanhood by starting her first menstrual cycle today at school, totally unexpected!

Yes, it's a bloody good day in the neighborhood!

and how are things with you? Like I care.

As far as Yours Truly, I have had this headache from hell all day long! and now I'm nauseated! till next time.

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fairy sprinkle blessings till next time!





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I ask you Kingdom ...

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Would Yours Truly, Queen BS lie to you? Click to get cool Animations for your MySpace profile


Yes, at my hillbilly palace, my couch sits on stilts! How embarrassing is that?


Have you ever seen a more redneck thing than that? I think not!


The Queen is still tiffed about that one! It just so happens that the gardener is not skilled in much and fixing couches is one of them!


*ROFLROFLROFL*


I know, I know, it's not his area of expertise, right?


oh!~ kiss my fairytale ass!


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fairy sprinkle blessings till next time!


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and the drama continues ...

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I see it has been a while since my last confession or bitchin' post! Actually Griszelda Mess and Lord Spoiled invaded the castle over the Labor Day Holiday. It was nice getting to see little Queenie, she did not leave my side for a moment, only spending maybe two hours with her other mamaw. Wyatt Earp spent the night with Yours Truly as well one night. All three of us camped out on my bedroom floor. Griszelda and Spoiled slept at his mother's ranch! Come to find out his mother and father were gone for the weekend, so his parent's house was their choice of residence! and it was infested with fleas! *shocked?* that's nasty! I can't stand jumping bug things! YIKES! It didn't bother me one iota they didn't stay here!

Oh yes, and Princess Golden Hair was here as well, the golden child! She is the only one who slept in a real bed! She got a little upset that her older sister Griszelda did not spend that quality time with her that she had promised to do. It was a little depressing for her. Both Griszela and Lord Spoiled look like that they had put on a few extra pounds, but then again they get Food Stamps, so they are eating well! and perhaps in part due to their being drug-free? well, that's debatable. I know one of their main focuses were to "hang out with friends" while they were up here the weekend. One house in particular just full of drugs!

Sunday, while they were here at the palace for a bit Lord Spoiled kept acting a little weird, I caught him in my kitchen acting snoopy, and when I confronted him he said he was looking for something for his headache, that of course Tylenol or ibuprofen would not cure! He's such a hypocondriac! and I did not approve much of his snooping tactics. He did this more than once! I felt on edge the whole time they were in my house, and I hardly ever left them unattended! He just creeped me out, and then when Monday came they both flopped their grown asses in here with the baby once again after leaving his parents house saying they were going back home. His mother had just told me that earlier in the day that instead of going back Monday they were probably going to wait until Tuesday because she felt he should deal with the issue of that "subpeona?"

Ah, yes, it seems his mother was showing the house to someone to try to sell it (the one they used to let him and Griszelda stay in) and a sheriff's deputy was looking for her precious can-do-nothing wrong son as that was his last listed address. She did not know if it was a warrant or what, and of course they (his parents) are ready to bail him out financially! Remember these are the people that he stole from for months on end for drugs! yeah, they're always good for more ready cash! and complain because they're broke?? Come to find out, Griszelda found out it was over a check. Needless to say, they were not going to wait until Tuesday, they were going back Monday evening. That's all we need another issue, huh?

Both of them acted like they were sleepy or "wiggin" and they slept for hours on end on my couch like druggies! while little Wyatt was left to run around in the house with the assumption that I was just going to babysit the whole idea of it all. They had decided to wait until it cooled down and leave later in the evening as they did not have an air conditioner in the car and their children would be exposed to the heat for 6 or 7 hours straight driving. Good thing I only had to work those 4 hours, otherwise my schedule would have been screwed and I don't think they would have gave a second thought about it. Yes, they acted like they were on drugs again.



Their behavior and the whole scene was like a flashback. I even confronted Griszelda about this. She said they were up late the night before but to me that is just bullshit. There's more to it than meets the eye. Lord Spoiled got up from his nap and just left! He was not the least concerned about either of the kids or his assumption that I was going to take care of everything, and off he went to get his fix I figured. Even Griszelda Mess was out cold, like a rock. Come to find out he said he wanted to get some pot, right, he gets drug tested for his job supposedly, so why? The whole thing was just fishy. Even the way they talked to one another was indicative of when they were 'using.' I was just disgusted.

My Little Queeine has called me a few times crying telling me she misses me and wants to come stay. Just last night she called. Her mommy and her were getting ready to make brownies. I talked to Griszelda and she sounded fine. I retiterated to her how important it is to spend some time one on one with little Queenie to make sure she is coping with school and that new stage of her life. Come to find out they do not have hot water. Obvoiusly they are not paying their bills, or something, which is another reason I am leery about what they are spending their money on. I still have my doubts as to what they are doing, but they are 7 hours away and I certainly have no control over that. I just hope and pray things are all right for the little ones.

just another day in hillbilly hell in the life of Yours Truly, fairy grandmother!

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Sprinkle my fairytale ass with blessings!


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Where Do I Begin?




I remember a friend of mine once told me it didn't matter what I wrote, but just to start writing, pour it out on paper. Every day just write something. I have kept journals of my life and times, ups and downs, of births and of deaths. I have felt betrayed by my written words by those I thought I loved at one point in my life. I have been stripped bare and emotionless from a paper trail. People twist and distort your written words and emotional death can result. I know this firsthand, so I haven't written in years because of it, I mean really written about anything that mattered. I wonder once I pass on from this world to the unknown, who would care? Who would care about my thoughts, my feelings, my heart at that point in my life? Who would care where I was, or who I was to someone else.

Perhaps only in our mind we think our importance in this world, when in fact, others hold no value of us. This past weekend I was at an outdoor flea market place with a friend of mine. I happened upon a table which held someone's family history and momentos of her life. I thought how sad those end up here in this place. I felt embarrassed for her, a wife, mother, grandmother, just like me, whose cherished and handmade items were separated or lost by her loved ones. I bet she never thought her unclothed soul would lie naked and exposed for the world to see. I felt a connection of a soul to a soul, as I picked up the pieces of her life that laid there and sifted through her thoughts. Surely, she was important to someone, loved by someone.

I wondered if perhaps I should go home and burn it all unless it had great personal significance; why bother to write it down if no one reads it or cares. If your relationship with your loved ones is not what it should be, why would one think that they would want to read it. We all value our lives, no matter how insignificant we become. Strange to me, I had never thought that my own paper trail could end up hurting me much less coming back to haunt me, but instead I thought perhaps leaving written words and journals of my life and times might be of importance to those in my life after my passing, a memento of sorts, but now I question the validity of that. With the passing of people dear to me, like my mother and father, and a friend, I know that all we have are moments and what we leave in the hearts of others, not on paper. I never envisioned they could end up lying on a table, here in a little town somewhere, meaningless to passerbys.

till next time.

Queen Style Bitchin'...


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Are you depressed?

Are you feeling frumpy, dumpy, and otherwise grumpy? bloated, constipated, and hated? Just had your fill of it ???

Me tooooooo!!!!! and my frickin’ hair is shedding? Shit … not again !!!! I just saw a picture of me in my mind … I’ll be this fat and dumpy, wrinkly, short and ugly little Appalachia bald woman … I used to be a heart stopper, and now I’m just a Betty Crocker … Geeze, how depressing …

All I really need is a permanent vacation with a big-fat paycheck … and an all over body-makeover complete with surgical enhancement !!! God send me a plastic surgeon to date!! or let me learn of some smut on one here so I can blackmail him into getting what I want. Well, that might not be such a great idea. I could come out looking like Barbara Streisand! Yikes …

Oh, just screw it. I guess I’m stuck in always and forever appalachia land! Who wants a hillbilly Queen, right? and a bitchy one to boot! I bet I couldn’t hire somebody to … (well never mind that thought!!) … nor could I hold ’em down long enough to … (well never mind that thought either !!!) … Don’t laugh … that ain’t funny !!

Isn’t it strange when you’re young you marry for love … and you wake up 10 years later and have children bitchin’ at ya for a pair of 100 dollar shoes and designer jeans to keep up with the “Jones’.” How stupid was that ? marrying for love !!! I did that TWICE and it didn’t get me SHIT !!! I still don’t have a retirement. I’ll be working till I’m 90.

I would love to have a parent to take care of me again !! I tell my 15-year-old to milk it as long as possible … that it’s a cold, cruel world out there … and that she should not to be in such a hurry to grow up! Her only gripe is that her Dad & Sandy (the stepmother) are fashion stupid and subjecting her to shopping at Wal-Mart to her back-to-school. Can you imagine such an atrosity ? Well, they do relent to take her to Value City every once in a while … No great news there. He was always a cheap ass. I pay him good child support money, too !! I take her to all the “Grannie and hip” places … after all, I AM the coolest mom!! Anyway, that’s what she says. You remember what it was like starting the new year at high school as a sophomore? … ah, the pressure of it all … clothes should be the last worry !! after all, GIRLS need STUFF!!!

I thought I had two of mine raised, but every once in awhile they come back to bite me on the ass !!! I keep thinking I’ll get even and just move away but so far I’m still here. I do have an idea, though, to get out of this one horse town. I think it’s rather inventive, actually.

I remember every once in a while seeing a man sitting on the concrete embunkment at the bridge with a cardboard sign saying ”Homeless” …. “Will Work For Food.” This is a bridge heavily trafficked with people from KY, Ohio, and West Virginia … Sometimes they even walked up towards peoples cars holding out a can or whatever as cars would have a red light often times before turning. It could be a little scary. My son begged me to stop one day, pleading with me that we should help. While I’m all about helping people, I am also cautious and refused to do so. I did offer to take my son to the local church here who fixes meals for homeless or otherwise very low income people so he could help the poor and otherwise down on their luck people by volunteering. Do you think he did that? heck no, but it never came back up in our discussion. I know myself, that at present, I’m just one paycheck from the street myself … so I’m hoping Mr. MoneyBags Man will help my otherwise dwindling bank account … however … Today, I have come to the realization that “Mr. Right and/or Mr. MoneyBags” may never drive by and see my red light on the front porch !!!

So, I’ve decided to make me a sign, and walk to the corner of the bridge and plant myself up a perch, all duded up and looking like the sexpot I am !!! and on my sign is posted, “Will Marry For Money.” and in finer print … “Honk if you’d like a blow job.”

I know its sick … shame on me … Oh, kiss my ass !!!

I ask you Kingdom is this proper behavior from Yours Truly, The Queen?

and a tiny voice says, "Mirror, mirror on the wall, aren't YOU the bichiest Queen of all!"


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Oh, kiss my ass again~!!


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Damn It..

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I have a three-ring circus going on! ... or perhaps more like a sitcom of "My Three Men"
*insert giggle here*
How did that happen?

Things couldn't be more complicated at the palace! I need to diversify and simplify! Not to mention improvements on my hillbilly castle are being pushed back to satisfy actual "work demands!"

Damn, damn demands! LOL

The Queen is also a little stressed with calls from Grizelda Mess stating she can't handle her responsibilities as a parent! and just venting to me about ALL of her issues. Little Queenie herself will call me, and say "Mamaw, mommy's being mean to me, I wanta come to your house, sometimes she's crying, and I can hear Griszelda's tone in the background, hateful, and that makes me angry! I wanta reach through the phone line and slam the shit out of her! She says that trying to discipline is a waste of time because little Princess Queenie just does not listen! Actually little Queenie is smarter than her mother and father! Neither one of these "grownups" has a clue on how to parent. Griszelda Mess says "You can have her." I told her only if she signed over the papers and made it legal.

I know she doesn't mean it, she just needs a good talking to by "The Nanny." Both Grizelda Mess and Lord Spoiled need a few lessons from the Nanny on THEIR behavior!

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"Shut up, quit complaining, and grow your ASS up!" it's grownup TIME-OUT! Sit in the corner! *ROFL*


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Will they ever learn? fairy godmother!


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