la vida es bella

Hey I want some of those...!

Doctor is dictating and MT typed...patient is on preservation capsules.

What are they preserving? Good looks? Is this a turn-back-the clock capsule?

Yep sign me up for those (if only they existed...however Google has other ideas...)

Image result for ding dong wrong

There is no such thing... actually it was dictated as PreserVision capsules for eyes!

Did I hear you right?

He will use butt frosting 3 times daily and as needed ... what?

That is what he dictated; and he said it twice.

Image result for cream used for incontinence on butt

I'm sure its some type of skin care barrier for those persons who might otherwise suffer skin breakdown from bladder or bowel incontinence ...

but still...

why call it frosting? geeze...I'm sure they don't mean butter cream!

Experimenting?

Claimant stated ... "Last night's fire sprinkler was talking to her in Morse code."

Amazing the drug history this young person has at only 20 years old.

She started using cannabis when she was 15 or 16 years old in 10th grade and she immediately started using cannabis drink daily, drinking few times a month. She used DXM (Dextromethorphan (DXM) is the active ingredient in most OTC cough medicines) every day for 3-4 months, started abusing Benadryl, LSD and ketamine. When she was 17, she used cannabis daily. In the 11th grade was drinking several times a month and started binge drinking. Used DXM every 1 or 2 weeks. She started abusing Adderall and Vyvanse as a senior in high school. She used cannabis daily, was drinking several times a month and continued to abuse LSD, tried mushrooms few times. After she graduated from high school she moved out. She is using cannabis all day every day and started binge drinking. After she turned 19 she started abusing heroin and OxyContin 4 times a week. Tramadol every day, cut down on cannabis and alcohol because she could not afford it. She tried methamphetamine several times on several occasions.

:(

Saturday fun...

Saturday, I called up Mother In Law, and she had Wyatt and I had Isabella and they had a pretty good time. Isabella and I had fun. Best fun we've had in a long while. It was good to see Wyatt, my grandson, whose 10. What kid could stand to be in the mall with 3 women and not complain?! haha..he was well behaved and so was Bella...later we went to see Split, the movie that was out. Can't say it was that gr8 a movie, especially for Bella, it kind of went over her head, and she nearly fell asleep! but there are some good movies coming out we'll have to see.

Monday, Monday...

its just now 10:30 and the coffee has perked. I think I slept too much! I went down for a nap yesterday around 3 PM got up at 7:30 PM...gracious! I had taken some ibuprofen cause I twisted my back or some shiz not sure

,,, and then I rolled around half the night in bed...waiting for the alarm to go off .. 3 ... 4 ... 5 ...

yep, I'm doing my thang...I am tired of working...

rescue me pleeeeeeeese!

this crazy weather ...

usually in February its the coldest month of the year here...However...that certainly hasn't been the case so far this year!

Right now its 41 degrees (high will stay in the 40s today), my furnace is running, tomorrow will get up into the upper 60s and this trend will carry through the entire next week. So much for winter.

Does this mean on my birthday in March (8th) I'm gonna get snowed in? It would not surprise me. I have a friend who says her daffodils are trying to bloom, so is the Central Park floral section...yep, crazy weather here! but who doesn't love some 60 degrees temps amidst the winter season?

Ya won't hear me complaining! 10-day forecast in the 60s. Tomorrow 62, staying in the 60s all weekend... hitting 69 on Sun/Mon, and 68 next Friday!

mmmm good!

what's my flavor? Cherry Garcia of course! what's yours? Nothing like a little Ben & Jer's to make me feel better! :)

"To thine own self be true,"

Happiness is a strangely elusive concept.

Its like peeing in your pants ~ everyone can see it but only you can feel the warmth ... merely moments of life's bliss, like having a full plate of bacon for breakfast! ... so try to make happy moments for yourself and those around you today~

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all in a day's work

hi there. being a Quality Analyst for a medical transcription company doesn't have too many perks except an occasional ROFLMAO at some typos or Speech Recognition (SR) boo-boos I find on nearly a daily basis...

SR Drafted: "The patient is currently single and is in a sedating relationship."

Dictated: The patient is currently single and is in a dating relationship. (I need one of those!) :)

MT typed that this female patient is vulvar aggressive. (and you thought PMS was bad...LOL!) Yep even you can be a vulvar aggressive female, if you're a female that is! haha! (actually dictated as verbal aggression)

The Pt will need to have cereal H&Hs...haha! should be serial H&Hs (hemoglobin and hematocrits)

He spoke in cartoon voices in an attempt to be humerus.

"The patient is in for followup of her solitary right kitty" ...WTF?

"The patient was playing with an eye pad during therapy."

skitsofrenic...? wow! now here's a good speller!

he had disheveled snow ...dictated as he had to shovel snow

The patient has a pet grandog named Porky... dictated as "groundhog" hahaha!! cracked me up!

This gentleman continues to do a support job with regards to using CPAP. ...dictated as superb job!

The patient is allergic to poison IV. hahaha!

"The patient reports she can barely hold onto her steering will."

We did a 24-hour tracking of eyes and nose. Dictated as...We did a 24-hour tracking of I&Os.

Once the strain gets going, he can urinate fairly well. Dictated as...Once the stream gets going, he can urinate fairly well.

"The patient works as a valley parker at The Cancer Center."

When patient was asked who Marie Curie was, "I think she's a famous hooker!"

The patient had a creme-filled filter placed!
(should have been a Greenfield filter, done for clots, circulation issues).

We did recheck a basic embolic pain yesterday, and this does reveal slight elevation in the creatinine to 1.4. *should be a basic metabolic panel*

She has a hobby of doing prostitute? say what? the doctor dictated She has a hobby of doing cross-stitching...LOL...that's pretty far out!

...Patient was alert and unresponsive.

...Exam of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized. (I don't care who ya are, that's funny!)

...Examination reveals a well-developed male lying in bed with his family in no distress.

...I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.

...While in the emergency room, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.

...She is numb from her toes down. (surely you don't have to think about this one!)

...The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

...Rectal exam revealed a normal size thyroid.

...When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.

...Discharge status: Alive but without permission.

with rest and paint thinners he states he is feeling better...LOL...since when does paint thinners sound like pain killers? ha! I suppose if you huff enough paint thinner you might feel better!

Can somebody tell me what a splenic fracture is? good gravy Mabel!

for more bloopers, see blog page In The World of Transcription under the heading "The Real Smut Stuff"

On My Radio

The air is cool, the colors fade, the long arm of night grows with a looming shade. Only small sparkles fill the sky, Where sounds of wings, blow on by. Yes this is a time to open ones mind, letting all in, yet sinking away..... Come all, let us play...

I love my music, all kinds, except hard heavy metal and bad rap, and I'm not a country fan at heart.

I am a sucker for good music quotes. I found this quote on REFLECTIONS blog, and I think it is great! "I have my own particular sorrows, loves, delights; and you have yours.

But sorrow, gladness, yearning, hope, love, belong to all of us, in all times and in all places.

Music is the only means whereby we feel these emotions in their universality."

~H.A. Overstreet

I found another great quote about music on a blog called "At The Starting Gate." It's fabulous!

Music is an expression that all can embrace, interpret, and feel. It is an expression that will never die and will constantly be created and twisted into enjoyable melodic prose.

Music is like an antidote, it helps reduce stress, it is what I can depend on when many things in life are not trustworthy.

Music is my sanity and my passion; a way to escape the physical world and express ideas and emotions. Music is a link to my dreams which helps me to relax, visualize and create.

Music is love, devotion, precise, discipline, and adoration and it brings me closer to God.