In Remembrance...

There has been a lot of remembrances written, loved ones lost, hearts broken, lives changed forever but if you haven't read this, you should.  Thanks Joe.



this is a tearjerking video.

Whose in charge?

All the organs of the body were having a meeting,

trying to decide who was the one in charge.



"I should be in charge," said the brain ,

"Because I run all the body's systems,

so without me nothing would happen."



"I should be in charge," said the blood ,

"Because I circulate oxygen all over

so without me you'd all waste away."



"I should be in charge," said the stomach,"

Because I process food and give

all of you energy."


"I should be in charge," said the legs,

"because I carry the body wherever it needs to go."



"I should be in charge," said the eyes,

"Because I allow the body to see where it goes."



"I should be in charge," said the rectum

"Because I'm responsible for waste removal."



All the other body parts laughed at the rectum

And insulted him, so in a huff,

he shut down tight.


Within a few days,

the brain had a terrible headache,

the stomach was bloated,

the legs got wobbly,

the eyes got watery,

and the blood was toxic.

They all decided that the

rectum should be the boss.


The Moral of the story?  The asshole is usually in charge!!

Love, Lust, or Marriage?

LOVE when your eyes meet across a crowded room
LUST when your tongues meet across a crowded room
MARRIAGE when your belt won't meet around your waist, and you don't care

LOVE when intercourse is called making love
LUST all other times
MARRIAGE what's intercourse?

LOVE when you argue over how many children to have
LUST When you argue over who gets the wet spot
MARRIAGE when you argue over money

LOVE when you share everything you own
LUST when you think twice about giving your partner bus money
MARRIAGE when the bank owns everything

LOVE when it doesn't matter if you don't climax
LUST when the relationship is over if you don't climax
MARRIAGE what's a climax?

LOVE when you phone each other just to say "Hi"
LUST when you phone each other just to organize sex
MARRIAGE when you phone each other to find out what time your son's game starts

LOVE when you write poems about your partner
LUST when all you write is your phone number
MARRIAGE when all you write are checks

LOVE when you show concern for your partners' feelings
LUST when you couldn't give a rip
MARRIAGE when your only concern is what's on TV

LOVE when your farewell is "I love you darling"
LUST when your farewell is "So, same time next week?"
MARRIAGE when your farewell is silent

LOVE when you are proud to be seen in public with your partner
LUST when you only ever see each other in the bedroom
MARRIAGE when you never see each other awake

LOVE when your heart flutters every time you see them
LUST when your groin twitches every time you see them
MARRIAGE when your wallet empties every time you see them

LOVE when nobody else matters
LUST when nobody else knows
MARRIAGE when everybody else matters and you don't care who knows

LOVE when all the songs on the radio describe exactly how you feel
LUST when it's just the same mushy old crap
MARRIAGE when you never listen to music

LOVE when breaking up is something you try not to think about
LUST when staying together is something you try not to think about
MARRIAGE when just getting through today is your only thought

LOVE when you're interested in everything your partner does
LUST when you're only interested in one thing
MARRIAGE when you're not interested in what your partner does and the one thing you're interested in is blogging; let him have his old golf game!!!!

just for laughs...

The Day's End...

Something about a Sunset.
We watch them. Some drive out to a bluff, some walk to a shoreline, some sit in chairs or on a back porch swing. Some, during an evening barbecue, stop mid-conversation to watch the last rays of the day give way to brilliance.
Something so distant in our genetic history is echoed forward in a wordless, primordial response that it binds history to the moment.
The last light of the day. The last light gives way to splendor. Clouds left from a passing storm blends, bends, and offers itself as a canvas for the glorious event.
Our souls vibrate with the prehistoric memories of confused excitement, awe and momentary fear of light passing into darkness.
All those ancient cellular memories touch us in the moment and we rejoice for it heralds another day coming.  ~author unknown~

haha!

A little girl goes to the barber shop with her father.

She stands next to the barber chair while her dad gets his hair cut, eating a snack cake.

The barber says to her, “Sweatheart, you’re gonna get hair on your Twinkie.”

She says, “Yes, I know, and I’m gonna get boobies too.”

One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class. She came to the part where Chicken warns the farmer. She read, “and Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, “The sky is falling!”

The teacher then asked the class, “and what do you think the farmer said?”

One little girl raised her hand and said, “I think he said, ‘holy sh*t a talking chicken!”

The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes! Ha!

What was Sally really selling by the Seashore?

A couple lived near the ocean and used to walk the beach a lot.

One summer they noticed a girl who was at the beach almost every day.

She wasn't unusual, nor was the travel bag she carried, except for one thing;

she would approach people who were sitting on the beach,

glance around and then speak to them.

Generally, the people would respond negatively and she would wander off.

But occasionally someone would nod and there would be a quick exchange of money and something that she carried in her bag.  The couple assumed that she was selling drugs and debated calling the cops, but since they didn't know for sure, they decided to just continue watching her.

After a couple of weeks the wife said,

'Honey, have you ever noticed that she only goes up to people with boom boxes and other electronic devices?'

He hadn't and said so..

Then she said, 'Tomorrow I want you to get a towel and our big radio and go lie out on the beach.  Then we can find out what she's really doing.'

Well, the plan went off without a hitch and the wife was almost hopping up and down with anticipation when she saw the girl talk to her husband and then leave.  The man then walked up the beach and met his wife at the road.

'Well, is she selling drugs?' she asked excitedly.

'No, she's not,' he said, enjoying this probably more than he should have.

'Well, what is it then? What does she do?' his wife fairly shrieked.

PLEASE SCROLL DOWN

!

!

OOOOH! You're gonna dislike me for this -

but it will make your day!

!

!

!

!

!

!

'She Sells C Cells by the Seashore.'

Yep, Sally was selling batteries by the seashore!

D-d-d-dude looks like a lady...

After a long night of making love, he notices a photo of another man on her nightstand by the bed. He begins to worry.

"Is this your husband?" he nervously asks.

"No, silly," she replies, snuggling up to him.

"Your boyfriend, then?" he continues.

"No, not at all," she says, nibbling away at his ear.

"Is it your dad or your brother?" he inquires, hoping to be reassured.

"No, no, no!!!" she answers.

"Well, who in the hell is he, then?" he demands.

"That's me before the surgery."